The Here and The Now??

Why is this phrase so widespread? Why do we strive to live in the here and now. What is found in "the now"? What are we seeking in the present moment? I was just finished reading a book called the "Secret of the Yamas" that explained the present moment quite eloquently. They asked readers to imagine the thought, thought "I cannot live with myself any longer?" It is in those moments that it becomes evident there must be 2 of you. There must be an "I" and a "self". Which one of these is real, which is the ego? Who is that voice in your head playing the internal dialogue and why are they so unhappy. How do you separate that voice from the sense of self that is deeper within? How do you gain more consciousness? How do you separate your past conditioning your past experiences, those repetitive negative thoughts from the true consciousness?

Is it true that the voice in your head can never be present in the "now", it can only survive in the past and in the future. It thrives on ruminating in the past, and worrying about the future. It loves to go over events in meticulous detail picking apart every wrong move, every unhappy moment etc. If so, how do we quiet that voice? How do we become more mindful? more aware? More PRESENT...

A poem grabbed my attention and summarized the thoughtsA Taste of Mindfulness;
Have you ever had the experience of stopping so completely,
of being in your body so completely,
of being in your life so completely,
that what you knew and what you didn't know
that what had been and what was yet to come
and the way things are right now
no longer held even the slightest hint of anxiety or discord?
A moment of complete presence beyond striving, beyond mere expectance, beyond the desire to escape, fix anything or plunge ahead.
A moment of pure being, a moment of pure seeing, pure feeling.
A moment in which life simply is.
And that "is-ness" grabs you by all your senses, all your memories by your very genes, by your loves

and welcomes you home.

That is a taste of mindfulness.

~Poem by Jon Kabat

Being present sounds so SIMPLE, doesnt it? But it really isn't easy. Sometimes I catch myself genuinely happy, really peaceful, and I stop to think. What is causing this? Is it when life simply is... when I allow life to be? The real meditation process is how you live your life everyday, it is not practiced alone in your room. I need to give myself permission to explore my own mind right now, and allow myself to love so that maybe I can wake up to a world that is much larger than the little lens I look through. It is a radical act of love to accept yourself, isnt it? Wow, it is hard. It is hard to be totally compassionate with yourself. In order to accept and find your true self you need to accept your mind with open arms. Not to say that things cannot be improved, but the more you battle yourself the more you take strides backwards.

I feel as though I am standing on the edge of a giant cliff just waiting for the breeze to catch my wings. I am becoming more aware of how unaware I have been for so long.